Day 1: Rob Zombie's Halloween 2
First, some babble.
It has been over two years since I saw the unnecessary remake to the film that brought John Carpenter's directing to the public eye and introduced Jamie Lee Curtis to the world. Rob Zombie's take on Halloween consisted of adding a vulgar and violent background story that took up a majority of the movie before seemingly jamming a slightly modified version of the original into the last thirty minutes.
In all honesty, John Carpenter is my favorite director so I was very skeptical going into the remake and it didn't really impress me. Although, I was happy to figure Carpenter got some cash to make up for them re-adapting his work. While my feelings towards the remake were an overall "Meh," it was met with much anger from others who blasted it for turning the subtle terror of Michael Myers into a hulking, mouth-breathing giant with some serious mommy issues.
So, when Halloween 2 first appeared in theaters, I ignored it. I had no real reason to make the drive in order to see the sequel in theaters. However, I did get to see the reviews. And wow...they were angry. And angry is a polite way to put it. The writing led me to believe Rob Zombie appeared on screen midway to discuss how everything they loved was wrong and his wife was obviously deserving of so many major acting roles. Therefore, I decided to give it a major pass.
Until now. Two years later, I finally decided to find out for myself what this movie was truly like. And...
Wow, that was bad.
Halloween 2 has parts that if better managed feel like they could have provided an enjoyable movie, but the final product leaves much to be desired. Yet, what I personally desired most of all was a good editor. This film didn't need to be pushing 2 hours long.
For the most part Halloween 2 is three stories being told and then being brought together for the finale. The main story is Michael Myers having constant images of his dead mother and younger self speaking to him, egging him on. A continuation of the much maligned mommy issues of the first movie that also allows Sheri Moon Zombie a significant role. For the majority of this, we see a hobo-ish Michael wandering towards his final destination, killing people along the way. And these parts show how Zombie is effective with giving brute force violence to shock an audience, but unable to build significant tension towards these attacks.
The second story follows Laurie Strode as she tries to recover from seeing her friends slaughtered before shooting her attacker in the face. Apparently, when you're already a troubled person, having issues like those can cause you be a bit wacky and in need of psychiatry. This is on equal footing with the first 'story' as Laurie finds out personal secrets about herself that even she didn't know causing her to act in an annoying fashion.
The shortest of the three stories follows Malcolm McDowell as Dr. Loomis. Since somehow surviving the first movie (which I can't really fault considering how in the original Halloween 2, Donald Pleasance sets off a giant explosion that catches Michael and him, yet both appear more than willing for the 4th film) Loomis has been profiting off books and circuit speeches in regards to his studying of the child turned giant with knife. However, his time in the spotlight is just about up as he's being criticized for his use of tragedy for cash and being openly mocked (especially by "Weird" Al Yankovic in a surprisingly fun cameo).
As I hinted towards before, Zombie seems to have amped up aspects of the remake that angered viewing audiences. The main thing being the changes to the iconic slasher. Nearly all the recognizable parts of the Michael Myers found in the original films are abandoned. He's a brute force first, mask abandoning, beard-growing, speaking giant with extraordinary strength. The only real stealth shown is when Zombie has him randomly appear behind people which appeared awkward. It looked like he took some ninja classes between films.
Acting wise, Brad Dourif plays the Sheriff exceptionally well. I kind of wish he could have had a larger role. Malcolm McDowell chews scenery and is okay at best.
GRADE: D-
While nothing really intriguing, the film may be okay with a group of friends who can vent frustration in the form of riffing. There are mildly good parts, but nothing worth praising for too long. In all, it's a big disappointment and while I find the first movie okay-at-best, this one is very unlikely to ever get a second viewing.
Zombie's style could have worked but near the end, I began wondering if the rumors of him being forced to do a sequel in order to get other projects approved were true. Did he just go through the motions? If so, I hope he realizes that all he did was show he sucks at the motions, too.
Thank you for reading and if you enjoyed this, you may enjoy my tongue-in-cheek approach to horror movie safety with my new E-Book
50 Plus 10: Horror Movie Survival Tips
Which you can find at the link:
http://www.lulu.com/product/ebook/50-plus-10-horror-movie-survival-tips/17364478
Or click on the nice looking picture thing-y.
With that done, the following are spoiler-ish Nit Picks.
So This is a warning for you to stop.
If you don't want spoilers.
...
Okay, I was rather frustrated at the overly long dream sequence that appears to reference the original Halloween 2. Being over 10 minutes long and taking the time to introduce what ends up being an imaginary fodder character seems just too much.
It seems odd that such brutal kills are delivered to people introduced solely to die, but major characters get quick, or offscreen (with brief flashes) kills. You'd think taking the time to actually introduce and have these people around would be in order to have the audience feel for them when the crushingly brutal destruction begins.
Laurie was completely unlikable to me. While I can understand why she's being portrayed in such a way, it was just plain annoying.
Dr. Loomis apparently can teleport when necessary to get to the ending, which was amusing.
The ending scene contains Myers being shot down. It was at that moment I realized how much of a mixture he was between the Jack Link's Sasquatch and Geico Caveman.
And I can't think of a better way to end this, so there you go. Thanks again.
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